joen toiselle puolelle
End-of-life-Doula in Joensuu
The literal translation of "joen toiselle puolelle" is "to the other side of the river".
When people hear the word doula, most think of birth doulas who assist before and after the birth of a baby. They support young mothers in the early days of motherhood, when emotions are mixed, all routines have changed, and new things must be learned. For many, the help of a doula is an important part of the process of welcoming a child into the world.
Isn't it wonderful that there are now death doulas who help people at the end of their lives, when emotions are mixed, all routines have changed, and new things must be learned?
Between these two events lies a lifetime. Regardless of how long life has been, what has been done and what has happened, every person should be given a proper ending to their story.
Sometimes it is difficult for those closest to them to do this. If this is your case, a death doula can help.
Let's have a chat.
Isn't it wonderful that there are now death doulas who help people at the end of their lives, when emotions are mixed, all routines have changed, and new things must be learned?
Between these two events lies a lifetime. Regardless of how long life has been, what has been done and what has happened, every person should be given a proper ending to their story.
Sometimes it is difficult for those closest to them to do this. If this is your case, a death doula can help.
Let's have a chat.
How can an end-of-life doula help?
Q & A
I have been diagnosed and I have a prognosis. I know that I am going to die. But I can't talk about it to anyone. I don't want to burden my loved ones. Can I talk to you?
Yes, you can. Sometimes it is difficult to talk to those closest to us, and it is good to have someone who will listen with compassion but who has no emotional connection to you, and therefore can focus on you.
Yes, you can. Sometimes it is difficult to talk to those closest to us, and it is good to have someone who will listen with compassion but who has no emotional connection to you, and therefore can focus on you.
A loved one is dying. I feel sad, angry, and frustrated. I feel guilty about my anger and frustration, and I can't talk to anyone about it. Can I talk to you?
Yes, you can. When someone dies, it brings up many different feelings. It may be easier to talk to someone who has a little distance. Feelings need to be experienced and expressed; there are no right or wrong feelings, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. As an end-of-life doula, I give you space to deal with your feelings. I am not a therapist, but I listen and am there for you.
Yes, you can. When someone dies, it brings up many different feelings. It may be easier to talk to someone who has a little distance. Feelings need to be experienced and expressed; there are no right or wrong feelings, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. As an end-of-life doula, I give you space to deal with your feelings. I am not a therapist, but I listen and am there for you.
I have had problems with some people in my life. I regret some of the things I have said and done. I would like to sort things out, but I don't know where to start. Can you help me with that?
Yes, I can. The burden of guilt and shame can be unbearable. In my experience, the process can begin by talking about it with someone you trust who is not involved. If you don't want to talk to a friend, pastor, or therapist, you can talk to me. I will listen to you and help you find a solution to your problem.
Yes, I can. The burden of guilt and shame can be unbearable. In my experience, the process can begin by talking about it with someone you trust who is not involved. If you don't want to talk to a friend, pastor, or therapist, you can talk to me. I will listen to you and help you find a solution to your problem.
A loved one has just passed away, and I feel relieved that their suffering has ended. Am I a bad person?
No, you are not. Grief is like a river; it finds its own path, sometimes calm, sometimes rapid, sometimes flowing underground for many years. No matter how long ago someone died, all feelings of loss are valid and acceptable.
No, you are not. Grief is like a river; it finds its own path, sometimes calm, sometimes rapid, sometimes flowing underground for many years. No matter how long ago someone died, all feelings of loss are valid and acceptable.
I have a bucket list, a list of things I want to do before I die, but there are some things I don't want to do alone. Would you join me if I asked you?
It depends. If it's bungee jumping, I can say a definite NO. Other things are negotiable.
It depends. If it's bungee jumping, I can say a definite NO. Other things are negotiable.
I am alone, my children have moved away and are very busy. I don't want to be a burden to them, also because our relationship is not very good. My friends have passed away. I can clean and cook for myself, I just need someone who has time to talk and look at my old photos with me. Is that something you do?
Yes, I enjoy talking and looking at photos. I am interested in people's stories. It would be an honor to hear your story.
Yes, I enjoy talking and looking at photos. I am interested in people's stories. It would be an honor to hear your story.
I am not sick, I am not old, but I think a lot about death and dying, and it scares me. No one I know has died, but I am very worried about it. Can I talk to you?
Of course you can talk to me. In my experience, talking about death and dying reduces the fear of it. Another person's perspective and experience can help. Being aware of death and the finiteness of life has helped me to live more consciously. But if talking doesn't help and the subject weighs on you in your daily life, I recommend seeing a therapist.
Of course you can talk to me. In my experience, talking about death and dying reduces the fear of it. Another person's perspective and experience can help. Being aware of death and the finiteness of life has helped me to live more consciously. But if talking doesn't help and the subject weighs on you in your daily life, I recommend seeing a therapist.
I am not sick, I am not old, but I think a lot about death and dying. I want to make sure that my family does not have to worry if something happens to me. I want to prepare my living will and care will, as well as other documents related to illness and death. Can you help me with that?
Yes, I can help you with these matters. I use the booklet "My Wishes" published by Lohtu Oy, which contains all the important documents. We can meet and go through it in person or online. You can book either one long session lasting about 4 hours or several individual sessions.
Yes, I can help you with these matters. I use the booklet "My Wishes" published by Lohtu Oy, which contains all the important documents. We can meet and go through it in person or online. You can book either one long session lasting about 4 hours or several individual sessions.
Your price seems quite high. Why?
Yes, I know. It seems high. The reason for this is that I don't want to rush from one client to another every day. In order to be there for you, I need time to take care of myself.
Prices for longer periods are negotiable, Please don't let the price stop you from contacting me.
It would be nice to have funding so that end-of-life doula services would be available to everyone.
What if I don't want a religious or traditional funeral? Can you help me with that?
Yes. We can start by looking at the options together.
Yes. We can start by looking at the options together.
Whether you are leaving silently or with a bang, whether you go to heaven or six feet under, you do not have to be alone. As an end-of-life doula, I walk by your side for as long as you need or wish.
It would be a privilege to be by your side.
It would be a privilege to be by your side.
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